Life Well Wondered

“Why doesn’t anyone understand?” The tears welled up in my eyes as the heart of my anxiety bubbled up into a question. I sat there unable to move and unable to stop the weight of worry growing in my chest. Stemming from the simple realization that we may not have done our taxes correctly the past year(s), the realization flowed quickly into the building anxiety over finances and the repeated questions in my mind of the fearful “what if’s” and “what could’s”. “Why is this such a big deal?” I asked myself. I tried to decipher my feelings and finally did as my heart asked: “Why doesn’t anyone understand? Don’t…

” Well, three years ago we had an apartment here in the States but were driving all around meeting with people everyday and staying in different places, and then we moved in with my parents before packing our life into a storage unit and moving to Asia, and then we had a place and a routine starting there after a while but came back for the summer and lived again with my parents and tried to meet with more people and figure out how to get a year’s worth of refrigerated injections over to Asia – which worked out just days before we flew back to Asia amidst a lot…

So many times I think I am going to grow outward or expand in more knowledge, new information, more “Aha!” moments in my life, my faith, my relationship with God. These high emotional experiences are like leaves on a tree — growing and expanding outward. These moments, these leaves are beautiful and have purpose, yet, the leaves are not what sustain the tree. The point of the leaves are to grow the roots of the tree deeper, to collect the sunlight and direct the water. These leaves eventually fall away when their purpose is complete. The emotional “Aha!” moment experiences fade away, but the roots remain. They are solid and…

Playful breezes roll off my cheek, They tousle through my hair, Telling of the love we share. Threads of silk free from their web, Cling, instead, unto my arm, Sharing whispers of your charm. Fields of light; harvest they bear, Dazzle, flow, and sway, Pointing me toward your True Way. Lifting my eyes to the above, Behold! A clear blue sky, Raising You, who reign on High!

No stack of pancakes or corner of your pillow smells better than a country morning a 5 a.m. Of course, I would not have known this myself had not a certain someone woke me up because he wanted to show me something. I could not fall back to sleep for some reason at 5 a.m. one of these past mornings. As I tiptoed downstairs and glanced out the window, the morning drew me out with its gentle color. The next thing I knew, I was on my bike pedaling down the gravel road. God wanted to show me something. The sun was not quite up yet, but the delicate, pink…

Fall is one of the most gorgeous times of the year. It’s like the climax of the story. The rising action bursting from spring and displaying itself throughout the summer has finally come to the point of change. And it’s dramatic. Just look around! The colors of the the leaves — who makes colors like that?! –reds, yellows, oranges, browns, purples YES purples… God does! The smells of fall, the sound of crunching leaves, the feel of a crisp mornings and cozy evenings, the tastes of apples and s’mores; hot chocolate and cider. Brilliant. Seasons are amazing, especially in the Midwest. Winter, Spring, Summer, Fall — each so distinct and…